Hello, my name is John Wilson, and I am a Certified Peer Specialist working with You Are Accountable. I’m a mixed-race man, half White and half Native American, and from the very beginning, I never quite fit in. I fought with the Native kids because I looked more white, and I fought with the white kids because I was “half red.” My father warned me early on not to talk much about myself, because it would only cause trouble. That was hard to navigate, especially since my grandfather was well known for his healing abilities. I didn’t know which direction to turn or where I belonged.

I started drinking and smoking weed around the age of 13. I gravitated toward the burnouts, the only group where I felt accepted, a mix of Native and white kids who were focused on partying and dealing. Eventually, the trouble caught up with me, and I had to move from Maryland to Florida.

Before I left, I came home from school one day and found my brother unconscious, choked out, and lying in the driveway. I moved to Florida hoping for a fresh start, but instead, I found even more trouble. Between the ages of 14 and 17, I was in and out of legal trouble, dealing, and eventually entered my first rehab at 17.

I did okay for a while. I got married at 18 and had a son. My wife and son mean the world to me, and to this day I don’t know how they tolerated everything I put them through.

For about 15 years, I worked as an entertainer on the Powwow trail as part of a drum group and as a storyteller, all while continuing to drink. I eventually opened several businesses of my own and, for a time, quit everything. Unfortunately, one of my employees introduced me to opioids, and I returned to drinking as well.

Long story short, I lost my businesses, my home, and nearly my family. At one of our ceremonies, a man approached me and helped get me connected with AA and NA. I haven’t looked back since.

I am active in my recovery and have worked across multiple levels of care, including residential treatment, IOP, and at UT Hospital in both the emergency department and inpatient units. I work closely with a sponsor and also sponsor others.

I could write a book about the experiences that were less than favorable, but I’ve learned that most of us share the same struggles, only the circumstances differ. My goal is simple, to be helpful. In my language, I am an Icke Wicasa, a common man sharing experience, strength, and hope.